Ninja do not Make Good Nursemaids
by That One Eccedentesiast
Summary: Kakashi has to take care of a twelve-year-old Naruto after he manages to break his leg. It might not be as bad as he expected. Tdbank316's prize for being my fifty-first reviewer on my Naruto fic "The Epic Rescue of Naruto and Sakura by Kakashi and Sasuke (but mostly Kakashi)". Complete.


_**Ninja do not make Good Nursemaids**_

* * *

"_**OW**_**! **_Ow, ow ow, ow!_"_  
_

"_Don't move, I see bone sticking out..."_

"_It **hurts** Kakashi-sensei!_"

"_I'm sure it does, what I'm wondering is why you're even conscious.._"

"_Probably because he has no sense, Kakashi-sensei; I mean, who jumps off buildings without looking? He's really lucky it was a bunch of crates and not a person where he landed!_"

"_That's n__ot helping Sakura..._"

"_Can we please go to the hospital now?!_"

"_Mah, we are, Sasuke, grab his stuff;_"

"_Yes__ sensei._"

"_You better hope this doesn't put you out of commission for the Chunin Exam Naruto..._"

* * *

Gazing at his student tucked loosely under a hospital throw, orange-cased foot glaring out at him like a safety light; Kakashi had to shake his head. At least the medic had given him something to knock him out for a while. He wasn't sure how much longer he could put up with his whining. Running a hand through his hair, he had to smile as drool dripped down Naruto's chin. Even in forced sleep he was disgustingly messy.

The sound of footsteps echo from down the hall and Kakashi turned his head "Sak-" the name cut short when he saw that it was not one of Naruto's teammates, but a dulled-eyed nurse.

"Oh, hello" he greeted with a curved eye.

A clipboard in hand, she frowned at him. "Are you his guardian?"

"I'm Naruto's teacher, so, yeah, I guess," he replied.

Whisking out a pen, she scribbled out several things before tearing out a note for him. "He'll need twenty-four hour care for the next few days-probably even after his check up on Wednesday..."

"Wait, wait," Kakashi started, "Why are you telling _me _this?"

A frustrated pucker came to her lips. "You are his guardian, are you not?"

"Yes..."

"Then you will be required to care for him until he has mended enough to take care of himself once more." She finished shoving the note into his hand and then scribbling something else and giving him that too. "That's for painkillers, you can pick them up tomorrow."

"I didn't agree to this!" Kakashi exclaimed exasperated.

Tucking her pen behind her ear, the woman shrugged. "You said you were his guardian, you don't have to agree." Looking once to the blond, she told him, "You can take him and leave whenever you're ready; he's been discharged." And with that, she left Kakashi to come to terms with his sudden appointment as Naruto's caretaker.

Fifteen minutes later, Sasuke and Sakura appeared; the girl holding a balloon with the words "Get Well!" printed across it and the Village's last Uchiha had a bag with several cartons of ramen.

Seeing his forlorn stare, the pink-haired teen asked, "What's wrong sensei?"

"I've been appointed his Guardian for at least a week," he replied.

A hand patted the crook between his forearm and upperarm; "I'm sorry Kakashi-sensei," and the girl does sound very apologetic.

"At least he's out right now," Sasuke offered optimistically.

Gazing at the blond on the bed, the jonin can only sigh in agreement; "Yeah."

* * *

Naruto was pain in the neck just as Kakashi expected. Within hours of bringing him to his apartment and parking him on the couch, the kid is moaning and griping like a two-year-old.

"I'm _booored _Kakashi-sensei!" He complained.

Staring at the blond from the kitchen chair he'd dragged into the room, Kakashi sighed. "What do you want me to do?" He asked.

Blue eyes study him. "Make me ramen?" He tested.

"Sure," Kakashi agreed in forced neutral tones; he couldn't let the kid know how eager he was to get away from him after all. "Sasuke and Sakura gave us a bag's worth," he chuckled.

Naruto's gaze lifted up to the balloon bopping in the air above him. "Yeah," he muttered; "That was nice of them..." a smile that's all Minato on his face, the boy remarked; "No one's ever gotten me stuff for being in the hospital before!"

The observation is heart-breaking, but it's soothed by the pride he feels for his team. It's good to see even with the rivalries between them, the kids know when to put it aside and support one another. And they mean it when they do it too. It sure is a hell lot more than he knew at their age (it took seeing Obito dying underneath that boulder and giving him his eye, for Kakashi to realize how much teammates matter).

* * *

It's a couple days later, Naruto is on the verge of screaming from the restlessness he feels when a knocking comes from Kakashi's door. Sitting up a little straighter (and jarring the ninken Kakashi had summoned to keep him warm a few hours before), the jonin passed him by and opened the door. Craning his neck, the blond saw-

"Iruka-sensei!" Naruto would have jumped up if it weren't for the fact that Kakashi's biggest summon-Bull-was lying across his lap.

There's a frown on the man's face, but it fell away in favor of sending a small smile to Naruto. "Hi Naruto," he greeted.

"What are you doing here?" The blond asked excitedly.

Taking a step in, the brunette held out a small parcel. "To see how you were doing," he answered; "_Especially _since no one told me that you were hurt to begin with." His eyes are accusing as they rest on his jonin-sensei.

Kakashi held up his hands in defense. "Mah, how was I supposed to know that you'd need to know?" He rebuffed.

Both impatient to tear into the package and not wanting to see his two teachers fight, Naruto inquired "Is that thing for me?" Finger pointing at the little parcel.

Blinking, Iruka walked over to him and handed over the brown-wrapped square with a wary glance at Bull. "It is," he answered.

"Thanks Iruka-sensei!" The boy shouted as he tore into the package. "Oh wow! Look Kakashi-sensei! He got me a ramen cookbook!" He frowned then, "I don't know how to cook..."

The brunette chuffed a laugh. "Don't worry, it's all pretty straightforward; just follow the directions."

Flipping through the pages, Naruto remarked with great enthusiasm; "This is way better than Kakashi-sensei's books!"

Body going rigid, the chunin shifted his body toward the jonin; a deadly glare directed at the taller man. "You've been letting him read those _pornographic novels_?"

A bit of a sweat breaking out on the back of his neck, Kakashi muttered; "Mah, he was bored. What would you suggest I have done with him?"

"I can think of _a lot _of things!" Iruka hissed. Grabbing the other ninja's wrist, he gritted; "Why don't we _discuss _those options in the other room?"

Realizing that there is no out, the taller man relented and allowed himself to be whisked into the kitchen where he was berated for a good fifteen minutes, before the chunin went to say his good-byes to Naruto and left.

When he finally left the kitchen to check on boy in his living room, the kid held up the book blissfully gesturing to one of the recipes. "Can we have this one for dinner, sensei? It has eggplant! You like eggplant right?"

Taking the cookbook, Kakashi scanned over the ingredients and directions. "Sure Naruto," he agreed. The smile he gave him in return was blinding. Maybe it was worth it to be berated by a chunin, if it meant Naruto would smile like that for getting something as simple as a cookbook.

At his reply, the boy began to chatter away about the book and some of the other recipes he read about. Taking a seat on the edge of a couch, Kakashi reached out and slowly pet one of his ninken and let the babble wash over him; nodding and humming in the appropriate spots. He may not have looked forward to watch Naruto as he healed up and sometimes he still feels like wanting to tear his hair out; but it isn't all that bad.

Naruto's a good kid after all.

* * *

**This revolved way more around ramen than I expected it to...well, I hope you don't mind that Tdbank316. What did you think? Is this fic satisfactory? Or do I need to go back to the drawing board and write you a new fic from the other prompt you gave me? **

**Thank you for the prompt btw, it did turn out to be quite fun to write :)**

**I hope you enjoyed it as well!**

**Thanks for reading Tdbank316 and everyone else too, pretty please review!**

**P.S. If you're a regular reader of mine (or not so regular) you can check out the poll on my page and vote for your favorite story idea for my next Naruto fic :)**


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